Sacred Music

Before:

The unwanted thoughts haunt me. I’ve punished myself accordingly, but the wounds only deepen my predicament. She knows what she’s doing to me – and she enjoys it. It would be best to avoid her altogether, and Arius knows the shifting corridors of Alcyone might allow it, but her role in our deliverance is too prominent. I have to hold my ground.

I’ve sent her a message. It dawns to me it’s not her I need to hinder, but myself.

The scripture suggests the humble subjects should test themselves through temptation. I realize that’s what this all has been about, this meandering, tormenting journey of pine, craving and abnegation. A test. I don’t know if I’m failing. Sister Aulos advises me to stay patient and to cherish the temperance in me.

I have no other thoughts. I have no other thoughts. I have no other thoughts.

If you knew her… You’d understand. As a final method of salvation I asked the sarcophagus to give me sacred music. And it gave us… something. A potential, a possibility. They are wondering now if they should let it replenish me.

After:

I can hear. I hadn’t understood I was deaf.